Previous entry Deleted. ^^

All well that end well. sorry yan ying. a moment of anger.

at least now everything's okay.

sorry for the harsh post.

my tagboard is back! finally. but i dont use CBOX anymore. =}

I'm gonna try out Flash instead!

tag me tag me!

I did a GOOD DEED today! Felt so satisfied!

I actually help an ah ma cross the road. she was clutching onto my arms and we were walking slowly even though the traffice has turn red man. she keep thanking me profusely after crossing. I was happy of course and she wanted to hire a cab so i offered to flag a cab for her!

the feeling of helping people is actually so fulfilling and satisfying. =P loves!

and reached boyy's home at 7pm. kinda late. but sorry! I didnt mean it! you should know! dui bu qi!!!!!

but i promise tml will try to reach as early as i could!

I'm like quite long never blog! Anyone miss me? =P alrights. I'm so HAPPY this week! even though i slept at 6+ am for 2 consecutive days. Hectic but well, after getting the end result, the effort is paid off. Thanks to Jiaoni and Yanying. for making it so successful. although that person turn inactive.

well, tml will be the cip presentation. =P so happy. after tml, it's the END! HEHE. but still, have to do CATS. -.-" the group is like @#$%^&* RAHH. wanna scream out loud! this few days i got serious mood swing. other than friday where beloved sandra came to NP. =]

one of it came from my bro's psle. seriously, i'm quite disappointed but haiz, forget it. still have time to buck up.i believe he can do it! and we have made the 6 selections for him. hopefully, get into any of the top 3 school.

something really troubled me. ALOT. chaileng, dont think too much. dont anyhow jump to conclusion. yes. must bear that in mind.

will anyone care when i'm sad? will they put some encouraging words in public? so that they felt happy when they saw it? i saw some put on msn, which envy me alot cuz normally the friends are not close to them and yet, they wrote encouraging stuffs. I'm being RANDOM. =]

mum said something to both of us just now.

mum: since you 2 are now, i tell you all something
me:(nod to the PC screen)
bro: (look up)

mum:xiang, when you go secondary, make sure you must zi ai(self-loved?) dont anyhow learn those bad things.
bro:(roll eyes)

mum:then cai ling, dont always go out. you also must zi ai. dont let others eat u up. understand?
me: mm(very annoyed)

bro:she got.........
me:(stared at my bro)
mum:got boyfriend huh?
me:(still remaining calm but blowing up)
bro: ORANGE!
me:-.-"

i going to kill my bro!
BIG MOUTH!

anyway, enough of that.

boy's at yh chalet. =) guess he's enjoying? yeah. whole day sms twice and stopped. =.=

dots. but at least he called me just now. dont matter. cause i'm quite busy though.sorry man. seriously i got no time and when my mum said that sentence, i already sian 1/2. made me dont know what to do.

she really give me the feeling of giving up relationship. grrrrrrr

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR!!!!
YOU OWE ME 17 PUNCHES!!!

alrights. have not being blogging for sometimes. cause i simply dont have the spare time to blog and now i'm like wasting time here. just wanna vent my anger here and pour out everything. I wanted to tell someone how i feel. but the time is not right. the person is not right. all i get is "okay" "oh". make me sian already.

sorry for venting out my anger just now. and i'm so fucked up by someone. i think brenda knows who. thanks for helping me and understanding me. Sorry if i've been rude just now.

can projects please faster over? ESPECIALLY CATS. PROJECTS LEAD TO QUARREL. how true. although not in my case yet, but i've been struggling like mad. conflicting with myself. maybe my expectation too high or maybe I pin too much hope but upsets me in the end. maybe i'm being picky. or maybe i'm just too disorganised that make me in this state. I'm disorganise. i agree.

seriously, I wanted to talk to someone, but who can i really true to? no one. I love poly and yet hate it too. I dont know how to say. It's not about studies. but more to relations. well, i shall just stop here.

TML'S CELEBRATING DEAR'S BiRTHDAY! =P

my backbone's acting up again! damn painful. I guess for the rest of my life i would be screaming for pain like mad. it will become my daily habit.

prays* few hours' time be happy!

Tagboard has been removed.
my blog has become meaningless.

May open a new one. I shall see how.

I hate this semester! To the CORE! seriously. Timetable for Tue is really terrible. OMG. I hate I hate! Everything is so unclear. instructions from teachers were different. Leads to nowhere. Next, I realised that I began to love IT alot! somehow, more than business cause IT really motivate me to study. guess i dont regret getting into this course afterall.

This sem is the slackest and live-less. BORiNG like NUTS! I wanna cry can? BSTATS damn SCREWED! DR TAN is leaving soon and he said if something cop up, MRS ANG would take over. NO! over my dead body!

NSS presentation is next week. HOHO. faster let it be over and yanhua, yes! We should keep up to our promise! Have LIFE after the PROJECTS!! you, ting, elena, jiaoni,yy all should go out ONE day! cause at least we can get along much much much much BETTER! AHAHAHA. CLOSER to each other in other words.

TODAY damn BORED. ESPECIAlLY THE 1 hour break = 1day. waited for damn long. after lesson which is like finally, went to meet up an online selller. after that, went back to school and EMO. HAHA. luckily got jiaoni. we met at the library coincidentally. =)) loves!!! when jiaoni saw me, she was like, "eh, you're here ah? i miss you and was thinking of you!" HAHA! so happy! but kinda sad that we didnt have a chance to eat lunch together. So, she pei me till 5.50 then i went to Jap. THANkS GIRL TRIPLE LOTS!

okay. i saw Renfred alot of times today. -.-" even on the bus.
9pm show is so NICE!keep me in suspense!so tml would be meeting boyy and sunday project @ school.sigh.alright. off to projects.

maybe you're right.I'm gonna have a sleepless night.

Wednesday is always my favourite yet bored day. =D sounds contradicting. =X whatever. HAHA. As usual, HIP HOP! my love! my love! today's choreography is simple as the dance steps are easier. BUT, the timing is hard to catch! RAHH! enjoyed the session today but Justin's injured. So today his mood's kinda bad. So, we were quite scared. AHAHA!

I dont understand WHY every wed would RAIN! maybe i should make the weather doll and put it at the window there on tue night and wed morning so that it wont rain! LOLS! i'm being lame. ah. whatever. =X

Mummy say we can go on holiday during the 2weeks of holiday that I've! yeah! although it's only malaysia and only 2 days, but i'm quite contended! can go on shopping spree! loves many! but i guess alot of people will surely miss me! especially my lil boy. =)))

I stayed at boy's house all day. doing nothing productive. -.- i keep surfing net. asshole man! HAHAS. watch the river placcid 2 or something. it's crocodile. alot of gross scenes and nudity. -.-

Anyway, I'm so upset with someone. At such a young age.. Smoke! AH. i cant do much. HAIZ. sorry. no offence to smokers. but i really dont like people smoking. even boy. he does know it. but. what can i do? let nature take its courses. I know one day, he would quit, again.

going to see my boy in 12 hours' time or more. =P It's like ... HAHA. long long time didnt meet him! lols. although just now we've met. AHAHA!

got to go! =] ALOT OF THINGS ARE NEEDED FOR ME TO ATTEND TO!TADA!

HAPPY 9 MONTHS!

time flies so fast.

let me show you guys the SCARF i have been SEARCHING LIKE NUTS AND FINALLY LET ME FOUND IT! CHECKERED IS THE THING~


buying this!!!! sweet!!!


this color is the one i've been looking for. but too mature


i'm considering this too!

hahahahahah! i gonna buy! but which color should i choose? anyone? please tag me! give me suggestion!!!

pictures speak a thousand word. so i'm not going to elaborate. =P cause i'm lazy. result will be out during the wekends. let's see if there's any call for me! PRAY HARD!!! we did a GREAT job although i cant figure out what i'm dancing at that time cause it's too fast.

anyway, will be staying at home all day for the next 2 days. I'm going to be a guai girl. stay at home and sleep. like a pig. it has been ages since i have a good rest.

i will miss dearie alot!!!! it's like... very long would not see him? and now, i'm gonna proceed with homework and stuffs! tada!

my cute cute dear and me!! =))

he's wearing the shirt that I've chose for him today while shopped for his clothes. NICE!

met dear Today! watched the Game Plan. whoos. damn nice and touching. i cried. omg.

okays. this few days kinda stress till i cant breathe. HAHA! abit exaggerating but true ah. Cause the project alone can make me go crazy can? tml will be DANCE AUDITION!! omg!! i'm so scared. wonder whats the outcome? pray REAL HARD that there's nothing wrong if not i sure -.-'' I didnt study Jap eh! shit! =(

things are better now between me and dear. somehow, i cried for no reason. and cried as if it's never ending. but well, at least i told him the reason and many things are obvious. Sat and sun wont be going out. gonna be a GUai girl stay at home. OMG! but i will miss dear!!! sobs! i wanna cry~ i'm trying hard to adapt to the adjustment now. maybe, our time are getting lesser and lesser, thats why i would feel like that and maybe, I'm already used to that life.

i need time to adapt. adapt. and i want to have more time with dear! NOT much time FOR US! URGH! 48hours per day is impossible. sian.

I'm going crazy. trying to sort out CIP budget. this project is challenging yet fun but gave me splitting headaches. there's class outing tomorrow too and I wonder if i should go. alot of stuffs are yet undone. like projects, the 30ideas, cip and nss elearning quiz, homework, jap etc. ALL so damn packed can? phone bill of 70+ already making me go nuts.

& yet, I dont know where the hell dear will be calling me. & when the hell am i meeting him. what the fuck am i doing now? urgh. i gonna start with ELEARNING if not i really will lag behind and fuck NSS. 5% weightage with 3hours quiz and got 30 marks of ESSAy question. what the?

i felt so worked up. but i cant calm down. I'm so.. just dont like this sem although it's triple slack! and my final choice is still D3. so goodbye strings. and who want to buy my unseen and untouch guitar? it's first hand can?

hip hop lesson today. Justin is so so so cool, sexy and charming can? the way he dance attracted the GIRLS and alot of them wanted to ask for his MSN. I wonder what they would talk to him on MSN if they ever gotten it. GIRLS, 5more months and he will be gone. cherish him man. this morning he was like standing BESIDE me and i dont know what to do. dont even dare to dance. a pro beside me = stone-ing time.act blur.

ahh. and now, it's like 1.33am. i see no call. i hear no sound. i'm disappointed. utterly. i want to give up. i wish that i could. i really wish. i dont know what he's doing and what he's thinking. i dont want to call him first, i dont want to. wanted to talk to jiaoni but guess she's asleep.


其實還愛你-emo song that i've being playing all night

每一夜闭上眼睛
我看到了恶梦
你微笑但是旁边的人不是我
天空切开一道裂缝直接割到我心中
不想装作脆弱
也不想爱得懦弱

omg!!! the dream phone!! K850i is OUT in STORE!!!!! I want it so much! it's newly launch together with W910 or something. URGH! 5 megapixel!!! i wanna buy it so much now!!!! damn expensive! 898$. URGH!!! i wait for next year cause my contract would be over by then!!! then i can get the phone!!!

I realised doing homework earlier would be better. I would have a sense of accomplishment. thats how i feel now! but seriously, i hate this semester. URGH! 1st, it's damn slack can? which i'm not used to it. secondly, there's alot of long break. -.- third, all the projects made me very BLUR! NSS and CIP. frankly speaking, i dont even know what we should do! must do presentation, website and report for CIP isit? then NSS? can someone enlighten me abit?

there's CATS somemore!-.- I dont know!!!!!! the 30 ideas. URGH! i cant think of it can. i think this sem the projects are going to pull down my overall grade. god damn it. RAHHHHHHHHHH. i think the slackest of all is BCOMM cause we dont chap at all. BCOMM is the last thing that i ever want to attend. MIRCO and BSTAT are my love. EAsier. no project. HAHA!

someone enlighten me please! i'm so so lost. alot of people have started their projects and mine haven! i'm so anxious. !!!!! RAHH!

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saturday
spent the whole day at dear's house cause i dont feel like going out. too tired and was rushing my jap homework. sleep sleep sleep after everything. dear's simply a lazy pig. always lazying on the bed. dont want to wake up! lols. oink oink boy. okay dear, dont worry. dont have to feel guilty that you left me out. dont worry eh. i'm fine. partly i think it's my fault and i have to think about the damn thing again. CCA! DANCE or STRINGS? the person called me about the guitar. sian. i think the guitar haven even import to sg! HAIZ. URGH!
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damn it. i got to go. and organise this week schedule. anyone wanna contact me please call or msg me. i wont be online tonight. i think. and i dont know if i should give myself 1 chance to go for the dance tomorrow. I dont know. jiaoni, please go with me. i dont know wanna quit or not because of the reason i told u.

and dear, take care! i will tell you my decision soon!

friday is the audition.

spending time with family actually quite happy. got the happiness feeling. dinner with family at ten mile junction. although we dont really speak much, the warmness could be felt. and it is my treat to them.

after that, went to sheng shong to buy stuffs. first time dad accompany us. he didnt complain anything either. everything just so.. sweet.

xingfu. really. i felt it. first time in my 17 years of life. happiness with family.

strings or D3? which should i give up?should i choose to give up the latter?

i hope i'm just thinking too much as what you've said

somehow, somewhere, somewhat

my mood can change just like that. suddenly damn stress. everything seems to be very screwed. dance, school, friends, com. Screwed. just hope that the attire for the audition wont change again cause i'm quite sick and tired of it. furthermore, i'm lagging behind can? i'm the last one who hasnt really remember the whole dance step. and i cant do the intro. damn shoulder. even yanying already know all the steps. left me. imagine, i got all mixed up because of the 3 different dance steps. D3, Hip Hop and this. and probably they would lose their patience ba if i still cant get it.

i dont know!! RAHH!! damn tired already can? there's presentation tml and i'm going to crap through. jap quiz tml too. think can fail already. life's so screwed. hopefully nothing goes wrong during the audition. but the person still haven call me so how would i know when we performing? AHHHHHH. shit them la. so slow. urgh. faster end everything.

prays* for the audition and the attire we are going to wear. hopefully it's not weird. if not can cry. can make me thinner for that day? so that i can fit in the tight fitting shirt? and the pants. i'm already very sad that the silk spag that i have been yearning for could not fit me. it's too small and too tight. blame it on my shoulder! i think can only fit in jiaoni's size. it's like extra small can. damn sad. but maybe i gona give it to jiaoni or sell it off. RAHH!

sense that she's weird